Dear LoveBites, my mother-in-law Dorothy passed six months ago, and I had hoped — just a little — for some peace. Instead she has taken up residence in my hallway mirror, criticizes my housekeeping through unexplained cold spots, and last week appeared at the foot of my bed to remark, in her distinctive voice, that I still don’t dust the baseboards. My husband says he cannot hear any of this. I believe him. She was always only awful to me.
— Still Her Target, Technically in Toledo
Dear Technically,
The fact that Dorothy traveled all the way from the afterlife specifically to comment on your baseboards tells you everything you need to know about her priorities — and none of it reflects poorly on you. Hauntings of this particular variety are, sadly, common among daughters-in-law. Cover the hallway mirror with a cloth (this is traditional and also satisfying), and the next time she appears at your bedside, simply say: “Dorothy, you are dead and I am not, which means I make the housekeeping decisions now.” Then turn over and go back to sleep. You have earned it.
LB